Bridging the Gap Between My Two Tribes!

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I reached out Irene – a cousin of a 1st cousin by marriage, her paternal 1st cousin; from my Life sustaining tribe – and also she is also a cousin from my original tribe. There is definite genetic & paper trails to her maternal grandmother.

I gave Irene the outline of my adoption; how we are connected through both my tribes and a little of the travels on this path.

I received a very positive uplifting response from Irene and value it more than I can actually convey at this time. No matter our connection; she considers me a cousin!

My world has always been about less than the predicted 6 degrees of separation – and so that trend continues.

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The Universe is working OT!!

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And Gloriously I might add – not a word I use to often, but here, today I FEEL the weight of that particular word!!

More ‘Cousins’ coming out of the woodwork!

If there was a DNA jackpot for responses from new found matches – then this would be the week I hit that pot’o’gold!!!

It as if there is a cosmic connection.

At the beginning of this week, my amazing & very talented [and self-less] an original tribe cousin, Melissa Ulto, released the first installment of her documentary series – COUSINS – RACE, IDENTITY & FAMILY – Trailer 1 or as I would also like to refer to it … ‘Cousin Reunification Project’ – enjoy!! I am proud to say that the participants in this trailer are also all my cousins!  
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BARTCgwOxdE&feature=youtu.be 

So, the cosmic ball is rolling and stones are turning over and people are responding from a variety of sources. I have received responses from my 23andme, Ancestry and Gedmatch accounts!!  WOW!!

The secret FaceBook page of Prima y Primo’s … is adding in new ‘family’ on almost a daily basis!

This is so exciting. People coming together.

I can only attribute it to the Universe being included in this quest, request, hope for finding out our truths, finding out our original story and unifying and connecting us even more to our original tribe.

Thank you dear cousins Melissa, and the other stars in our quest to our roots: Teresa, Carmen, Luis, Maddy [brother & husband] & Iris.

Finding Our Common Ground

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My search is no closer today than it was months ago

But life is richer having met so many amazing DNA matches that I endearingly refer to as ‘cousins’. A few months back I initiated a ‘private’ Facebook page that is encompassed of my DNA matches and any one in the group is welcome to add in their DNA matches. We have gone different routes to try to pull together the information that everyone is sharing from old family photos, family trees, comparing gedmatch numbers and search tips and reference materials.

This ‘networking’ is a very un-attached type of description for it. Really, this group of 130+ has it’s own personality. It’s a place of warmth, caring, laughter and it’s evolving. Hard describe a Facebook page as that – but really has become my favorite place to catch up. It emits a positive vibe, encourages the members to come a little out of their shell and share and comment.

Today, we try a new forum – a blog / website. I initiated that too – but like the Facebook page; it’s is nothing without the members and their input. We all have different reasons for doing DNA testing and trying to piece together a past that is ours for the taking; the learning; the sharing.

Right now we are all on a path of unearthing that past. From there we will build our trees and see how that root has taken and given us our now. We will add to those branches so we can give our offspring their foundations. This new found ‘family’ is working together, learning together, growing together all due to common ground.

Secret Society Musings

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Recently I started a Facebook page with just DNA matches. The criteria is that you must match a member on the page via DNA. So, everyone has either tested on one or more or all of the following DNA sites; 23andme, FTDNA, Ancestry & many have uploaded to Gedmatch.

For selfish reasons; we have made the page ‘private’. So, no one other than members know what we post, when we post it. Basically – we are all a bit geeky in the DNA world. Some of us are much more adept at understanding this amazing technology / information than others. I fall into the category ‘than others’. I am a novice at understanding it all, but I am getting there. It is fortunate that I have these wonderful primas y primos to share, compare and query with.

I look at these 1:1 comparisons on Gedmatch and I know there are answers here; but I am not a genetic Genealogist [yet – LOL] there are two cousins both related to me and to each other. They share the same surname. However, I am not related to them on the same chromosome. What does this mean? Well, a few months back I found out if we end up sharing on the same chromosome; then we share a common ancestor. Common ancestor – the theme of my search. I have been unsuccessful so far in finding a common ancestor. There is always the DNA response; Random Recombination which is, I think, the pat answer. When it lies outside the expectations, yet there is a connection.

try again

Comparing Cousins – they are related – same surnames – but not a common ancestor readily found

On a positive note; it’s a different experience connecting with people that you never knew about and share DNA with. I was thinking just the other day – these are 3rd plus cousins and I probably might have never met them had I known about them all my life / all their life. Here in the DNA world there is some strange and wonderful occurrence where we do not take each other for granted; we celebrate even the smallest shred of shared DNA. we welcome with open arms the cousins of our cousins that have also been invited to share in this ‘Secret Society’.

Grateful to experience this new world; however confusing and frustrating [because the puzzle pieces aren’t fitting yet] at times it can be.

More Stories of Mi Primos

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Unsure of even what the title for this should be; ‘more adoption stories’, ‘what an interesting DNA family we have’,

The bottom line is that I have found I am not so unique, not so alone. Our ‘DNA’ family seems to have a few more stories in the proverbial closet.

As I have delved into the world of DNA testing and been given a slew of ‘matches’ I have been privy to their stories as well.

There are several; these are the ones I know of:
AO – looking for her bio-dad. AS a an adult with an adult son; she finally heard the truth from her mom. She won’t believe anything until science, DNA test confirms it.

SO – Korean born, adopted West Coast, USA

BA – lives in the Carolina area, never had any identifying info

SM – really has no info, is looking

KA – figured it all out, denied by birth mother

MB – looking for immediate family info, parents perished at an early age; they were both 25. They left behind 5 small children to become orphans. Why are she & her siblings so fair with blond hair? What are there roots?

LF – born here on the East Coast, relocated to Europe where she has been for decades. Enlisted the assistance of a genealogical PI and found her mom & brother. After meeting & engaging with her bio-brother that has some serious emotional issues, she agrees with her mom; her being adopted out was the best thing the mom could have done.

SR – adopted out twice and then finally left home as a teenager. Out on her own, she is a success story. finally able to piece together her story because of another shared match that shed light. She knows her grandfather on his deathbed let her siblings know they had a sister out there and this regret could not go with him to the next plane.

DM & TB – sisters, they also have at least one other brother who I have noticed as a match for me in the DNA sites. They are looking for their dad.

SM – looking for her dad; was never in the picture growing up. Had no idea who he was. finally did DNA testing and a 3rd cousin to me matched her very closely.Turned out it was her dad’s first cousin. There was a brief reunion after he was ‘informed’ he had a daughter. Then it hit the rocks. Hoping that things work themselves out soon for them.

LV – very little info on her dad’s side of the family. One of many children spread far and wide … was he even ‘legit’?

Patricia – born in Spain, unsure of even her birth year, had surgery as an infant or toddler, scar to prove it. Her parents are probably from Puerto Rico. She has recently done DNA testing and is using social media and every other type of communication to get her story out. I am in awe of her perseverance, dedication, and all to well understand her obsession with finding out her truth. Her story  We are in connected through social media, email back and forth, but there is a caveat for me and this new found cousin is that we are separated not just by the ocean; but by language.                                                  Her story is pasted below!

HA – half siblings out there; they didn’t grow up together and so they shun their blood.

MN – adopted, found his mom; looking for his dad.
Has a good relationship with his half sisters.

AR – grew up with very abusive, abandoning and inattentive mom. Finally met his father. After meeting him, mother divulged he was a product of rape.

HO – a 2nd to 4th cousin that might hold a key, a false hope; his mom was adopted; no information there either.

Reached out – waiting to hear back:
H – adopted out as infant; looking for her birth family & roots.
A – adopted, knows birth name
I – grew up in an orphanage in the Bronx

MV – a cousin of a cousin. We actually share many cousins; we are thinking probably we are cousins – but have been unconnected through random recombination. We have connected through social media and she is actually the translating go between for Patricia & I. She too is looking for her dad.

 

Patricia’s Story!!!  Please feel free to share / re-post, talk about it / get the word out however you can!!!

New Information – Maternal surname – Adela / Paternal Surname – Thomas

Weighed in 2 lbs appox in the February 1976 – due to congenital heart condition? or low birth weight – unknown still at this time.

Mi busqueda realizada por Annette

IMPORTANTE
Esta es una historia real y tu oportunidad de ayudar a alguien- por favor léelo y compártelo. Patricia Perez Saes fue adoptada y criada en España y se acaba de realizar pruebas de ADN con las cuales descubrió que su madre es PUERTORRIQUEÑA. Su madre pudo estar estudiando en alguna universidad o residiendo en España entre 1974 y 1977. Pudo haber dado a su bebé en adopción voluntariamente, como pudo haber sido presionada o víctima de un esquema de robo de niños que hubo en el mismo hogar de adopción de Madrid en el cual estuvo Patricia, situado justo al lado de un hospital en el cual muchas veces le decían a las madres que sus bebé había fallecido, para darlo en adopción. Patricia es una prima lejana mía, según revelan las pruebas de ADN, pero tan lejana que hace imposible identificar por quién exactamente estamos emparentadas. La quiero ayudar a encontrar a su mamá y necesita la ayuda de puertorriqueños que compartan esto, para regar la voz, con la esperanza de que su madre vea esto. Quizás es alguien que ha vivido con el dolor de pensar a una hija muerta, o quizás apretar ese botón le da la oportunidad de una vida, de conocer a esa bebé que, por razones que desconocemos, entregó hace 4 décadas.
IMPORTANT
This is a true story and your chance to help someone-please read it and share it. Patricia Perez Saes was adopted and raised in Spain and just DNA testing with which he discovered that his mother is PUERTO RICAN. His mother could be studying at a university or residing in Spain between 1974 and 1977 could have given her baby up for adoption voluntarily, as might have been pressed or the victim of a theft scheme of children in the household were making Madrid in which Patricia was located right next to a hospital in which often were telling mothers their babies had died, to give it up for adoption. Patricia is a distant cousin of mine, as revealed by DNA testing, but so far it impossible to identify exactly who we’re related. I want to help find his mom and need help Puerto Ricans share this, to spread the word, hoping that her mother sees this. Maybe someone who has lived with the pain of thinking to a dead child, or perhaps push that button gives you the opportunity of a lifetime, to meet the baby, for reasons unknown, gave 4 decades.

 

 

 

 

Patricia, another adopted cousin reaching out; this time from Spain!

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Yesterday I received a 23andme message from a new match. It seems a cousins from across the Atlantic has reached out. She is looking for her birth-family also. She is unsure of not just her date of birth; but also her year of birth.

There is a slight language barrier, she speaks Spanish & French fluently, she is unsure of her English. I speak English & Brooklyn-ese.

Appreciate technology and Google translate. Unsure of how much it gets across my actual meaning – but it’s all we have for now. I am excited to meet another cousin. However, the list of adopted cousins continues to grow – I guess 10 or so out of 1000+ isn’t so bad!

I have some ideas for her; I wait to hear back from her.

 

 

What’s in store for me today!!

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Another call to make today and another cousin has reached back out to me.

We have gone back and forth in email. She has been forthcoming with information and suggestions and has even shared her ancestry.com account with me. I haven’t had the chance to delve into yet; but she has 140 relatives listed.This seems promising! THANKS APB!!

The difference now is that I understand the connections a bit better

I understand that the information I can assimilate from their family trees might help me to the path of mine.

I wonder; when my sons are older, will they want to know who their dad is? Will I travel this road again with them as we look into the person that is #1234#!

li n big bro jan 2014